Generally, we recommend restraint when it comes to emojis. Or just not using them at all. That works, too. But when it comes to Nick Offerman's line of handcrafted, solid wood smiley faces and pointy-eared cats, a more resounding endorsement we could not give. Last night on Conan, the Parks and Recreation star and noted woodworker unveiled a line of decidedly more manly emojis, each weighing 14 pounds and measuring about a foot in diameter. Instead of flippantly using these hefty icons to punctate text messages, Offerman's emojis must be toted around in an industrial burlap bag before they are arranged and fastened together with nails. Don't forget the varnish, either. Watch below:

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