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Wave of support for school's ban on parents wearing pyjamas

This article is more than 8 years old

Darlington headteacher says she has been bombarded with encouragement after writing to parents asking them to dress properly when dropping children off

A primary school headteacher says she has been bombarded with supportive messages after writing to parents asking them to wash in the morning and to stop dropping off their children in their pyjamas.

Kate Chisholm, head of Skerne Park academy in Darlington, made the appeal after noticing an increase in parents wearing pyjamas at the school gates and even at Christmas performances.

“I just thought, can I condone this? It’s all very well having the right to do what you want but we’re trying to raise standards in the school. We want children to know what it’s like in the outside world. I thought I’ve got to say something, so I did,” she said on Wednesday.

Her letter to parents on Monday went viral after being shared on social media. But it may not have had the desired effect on the 50 parents – out of a school of 450 children – who regularly turn up to the school gates in their nightwear. “Funnily, since it’s gone on Facebook and gone viral, a number of parents wore pyjamas deliberately today to make a point. It’s the same old culprits,” Chisholm said.

“I’ve had loads of parents ringing me saying they support it, saying they’re pleased we’re making a stand, because they’re very proud of their estate and they don’t want to have the ‘Benefits Street’ image.” She added: “It’s crept up and it seems to be normalised, so more people do it. It just came to a point where it seemed quite a substantial number of parents doing it.

“We’ve also had some people who haven’t been very nice about it. But the people who haven’t been supportive have been more jumping on the moral high ground of ‘who am I to tell people how to dress’ – and a couple of disgruntled parents who don’t like me anyway. Proportionately, it’s been overwhelmingly supportive.”

Chisholm said she had received more than 150 supportive emails and phone calls since the letter went public, including from parents and other headteachers in Darlington and nationwide. The school sits in the middle of Skerne Park, a council estate on the southern edge of Darlington, opposite a closed pub, a kebab shop and a Londis grocery with a poster on the door: “One child at a time. Unless accompanied by an adult.”

The letter to parents from Kate Chisholm, headteacher at Skerne Park Academy in Darlington. Photograph: Phil Naylor/PA

As parents picked up their children on a blustery Wednesday afternoon, many expressed anger – not at the headteacher’s letter, but at the reaction it has caused online. “Oh we’ve had people saying hygiene things like ‘scummy mummy’, ‘go home and get a wash’, ‘go watch Jezza Kyle’,” said Charlotte Scott as she picked her children up. Her friend Fiona Jenkinson said: “It’s not the letter, it’s the reaction online. It’s gone out of proportion and now everybody’s angry.”

Rebecca Bell, who has two children at the school, said she felt the headteacher didn’t mean for the letter to gain so much attention – and that now the focus had shifted to the Skerne Park estate. “The only thing that annoys me is that everyone in Skerne Park is getting slated, just because a handful – and it is a handful, not 50 or even 30 – have got pyjamas on. Social media is a place people get hurt.”

Claire Slaven, who was waiting opposite the school to catch her bus to work, said the reaction to the letter – including the tag ”slummy mummies” – had angered some in the community. She said: “I understand where the headteacher’s coming from but as long as the kids are getting to school on time what does it matter? The biggest thing that’s getting people’s backs up is that it’s gone on social media, having a bad reflection on the whole community and people are calling us lazy bums and that’s not nice.”

Another group of parents pledged to wear their pyjamas with pride at the school gates on Thursday morning, in defiance of the crackdown. Emma Wilson, a mother who was pictured dropping her children at the school in nightwear, said she had been attacked online for her choice of clothing. “I’m all over the news as a ‘slummy mummy’ with people saying I should get a job. I’ve got a job - I’m a full-time carer,” she said.

Glenn Younghusband, a painter, said the whole thing had been blown out of proportion. “It doesn’t matter if you come in a clown outfit as long as your kids get to school on time and get an education,” he said, outside the school with his seven-year-old son. “I’m in my work gear. Does that mean I’m not allowed here to pick my bairn up? I think it’s stupid.” His partner Nadine Tanner, said: “We’re all coming in our pyjamas tomorrow!”

Jess Daniel, 17, said she wore her pyjamas every morning to drop her niece off at the school, and wouldn’t change her ways after the headteacher’s letter. “It’ll make me do it more,” she said. “I think it’s ridiculous. It’s shaming people. It’s all over Facebook and people think we’re slummy mummies.”

Some, however, were strongly against parents wearing pyjamas to the school gates. One woman, who did not want to give her name, said had been mortified to see parents picking their children up in the middle of the afternoon in dressing gowns and slippers. She said: “My personal opinion is that you shouldn’t leave the house in pyjamas. I think it’s shocking to be honest. It’s lowering the values of society. I’m mortified if I even answer the door to the delivery man in my dressing gown on my day off.”

It is not a feature unique to Skerne Park academy. Locals said parents at schools all over the town pick up children in their nightwear – and Tesco in nearby Newton Aycliffe is said to have banned shoppers from wearing pyjamas in the store.The issue appears to be of growing concern to local schools but one that they had been reluctant to address until now.

“I’ve had a number of headteachers from Darlington ringing me saying ‘well done for taking a stand and we all should really do something’. I’ve had a number of emails from heads across the country,” Chisholm said.

“I’ve had an 85-year-old man ringing every 20 minutes every time something pops up on the news because he loves it. I’ve actually had to disable my Facebook account because it was being bombarded with friend requests. It’s been overwhelming.”

It is not the first controversial letter Chisholm has sent since she became head four years ago. There was a minor backlash when she wrote to parents asking them to ensure their children wear black shoes for school, not black trainers. “I got rid of boys having rat-tails in their hair and black trainers – that was quite an issue, the parents didn’t like that,” she said.

Families collecting their children from the school on Monday told the Northern Echo that they supported the headteacher’s letter. Leigh Emmott said: “It does make a difference if parents drop off their kids wearing pyjamas. It’s a bad example to set to children because you can’t turn up to work in pyjamas, you have to be smart at all times. As a mother-of-six I’ve never turned up to pick up the kids in pyjamas, but other people do and I don’t think it’s right.”

Grandmother Valerie Hall said: “I’ve heard of a lot of people doing it and I agree with what the school has done about it.”

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