As schools reopen amid the coronavirus pandemic, students are facing challenges they've never imagined. Teen Vogue's Fear and Learning in America series is exploring what back to school means for students this year, and what they think about learning during the COVID-19 crisis.
According to a 2018 survey, about 1 in 4 teenage girls in the United States had self-harmed in the previous year. At 18, I too self harmed. Two weeks before my college orientation, my father died in a car accident. In an instant, I went from picking out dorm room bedsheets to black formal wear.
As the first member of my Portuguese-American family to go to college, my first semester grades were good. But as my unrelenting grief grew heavier, I did whatever I could to repress the weight of it all. At my first—and only—frat party, I drank so much Jungle Juice I passed out in the middle of campus and had to be taken to the local hospital by ambulance. In the weeks that followed, I made multiple questionable sexual decisions that could have left me with an STI or pregnant. When I got bored of sex, I roared down highways in the fast lane. I wondered what it would be like to die the way my father had. But my suicidal ideation didn’t stop there.
Girl, Interrupted and The Bell Jar showed me that all I had to do was have the courage to push the blade down hard enough, and all would be released. In reality, that couldn’t have been farther from the truth. When I did cut myself, there was nothing but more pain. I never cut again.
Today, I’m 31 years old. With years of therapy and a moderate dose of an antidepressant, I'm the most stable I’ve ever been. But I often think back to that girl standing in the shower with a razor in her hand. What if I had died by suicide?
As an educator, I have had this same fear, and thousands of others, for many of the students I’ve served in my seven years of teaching in an urban high school in greater Boston in Massachusetts. Like most teachers who have a few years under their belt, I’ve willingly stepped into a multitude of roles, everything from a relationship expert to a pseudo-guardian. But with COVID-19 exacerbating inequalities of all kinds and increasing mental stress on young people, I fear that the mental health impact on my students and the students of our country will be worse than ever.
A 2008 report found that two-thirds of children in community samples said they’d experienced a traumatic event by age 16. But that was before coronavirus, before the anxiety rates for Black teens were increasing at an alarming rate in the aftermath of George Floyd's death. As the mental health toll of COVID-19 weighs on young people, and as more school districts opt for alternative learning plans, it is now more important than ever for equitable support structures to be put in place before the start of the school year.
While virtual classrooms mitigate the risk of COVID-19, they pose other issues. Among the most vulnerable of students include those with learning and intellectual disabilities. Integrative child psychotherapist Caroline Logsdail of the TRC Group, a U.K.-based therapy center specializing in adolescent mental health, said that students with Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) have been particularly challenged during the last few months because they thrive on consistency and routine, something the pandemic has been anything but. Students with unstable home environments have also been hit hard. “If a young person doesn’t feel safe and secure in their own home,” Logsdail says, “remote learning is not going to be successful.”
Dr. Michael Murphy, M.D., M.P.H., executive medical director for River Oaks Treatment Center, an American Addiction Centers facility, said the LGBTQ community is also especially at risk. A 2014 report by the Urban Institute found that students who identified as transgender were more likely to live independently sooner in their lifetime because of family rejection or violence. In large part, many students within the LGBTQ community feel their voices aren’t represented on the teacher level or among their peers even with traditional in-person learning. Problems and tensions may rise in an online environment, Dr. Murphy says, as students may habitually come to silence themselves if they become intimidated or fearful of such an unfamiliar setting.
Unfortunately, remote learning might be our only option. Countries like Israel reopened their schools in May and have now become cautionary tales. Most recently, Georgia has been one of the states under frequent scrutiny not only for its legal battles over a state-issued mask mandate, but for a leaked photo of a congested high school hallway that showed many students not wearing masks with no social distancing. Nine people within the school have tested positive for COVID-19 less than a week after the photo went viral.
If schools and universities are to deliver the same equitable education to students as if they were in-person, then many things need to change. Oliver Sindall, a clinical psychologist specializing in child and adolescent mental health, believes that come September, every academic institution should have a well thought-out mental health communication strategy. “This would provide a system for normalizing the psychological impact of lockdown and COVID-19, encouraging students to notice if they are struggling and signposting them to the appropriate support,” he says.
Clinical psychologist Michaela Dunbar of My Easy Therapy believes that looking after one’s mental health is not just for the lucky or those who can afford therapy. All students and staff should be made aware of basic mental health intervention. In doing so, a teacher or professor will be able to spot students who feel overwhelmed, and will not hesitate to broach the subject of burnout as part of their regular check-in. Signs of emotional or mental distress might include feelings of impatience or irritation, finding it difficult to focus, having trouble sleeping, finding little to no motivation, or using alcohol or drugs as a way to cope with stress.
Basic self-care is a must. Students should aspire to maintain a routine sleep schedule, healthy eating habits, moderate exercise and drinking plenty of water, but it’s important to note that self-care does not have to be costly or time-consuming as social media tends to suggest with images of luxurious weekend mind-body retreats. “The idea with initiating self-care and integrating it into everyday life,” says Dunbar, “is to find out what feels good to you—something that you genuinely enjoy doing, and that fits with your lifestyle and your values. Once self-care becomes a part of everyday life, it is likely that students will become more and more protective of that time and wonder how they ever managed without it.”
To give your eyes a break from that tenth Zoom call, rather than sitting on TikTok for an hour, opt instead to read a book or a magazine, or give yourself a much-needed mani/pedi. To get your legs moving, have a 20 minute stretching session on your yoga mat, or throw on your favorite playlist and have a dance party. And for all those “just because” moments, put on a rocking outfit, bake a dessert you love, or simply relish the silence of a quiet, open space.
Thirteen years ago, I was not equipped to handle the trauma at my doorstep, but somehow I made it out alive. It would be naive to think the students of today will be so lucky. For young people to be able to overcome this life-altering environment, they need to have the wherewithal to do so, but for that to happen, we need to prioritize their survival.
If you or someone you know is contemplating suicide, call the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at 1-800-273-8255 or text Crisis Text Line at 741-741.
